Full Circle
by Kizmet
Summary: Buffy's died everyone struggles to cope. Takes place several years after the 3rd season but nothing after GDII has happened.
1. part 1

**Full Circle**

Disclaimer: Characters and Premise are borrowed from the show "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer."

Time was supposed to heal all wounds, Xander thought bitterly looking down at the darkly hansom vampire huddled against the headstone. The years might have healed Angel's body, but they hadn't done much for his sanity. 

"Angel, it's time to go home," Xander said, gently he rested his hands on his old rival's shoulders. 

"I don't want to go. I shouldn't leave her," Angel's voice was plaintive, childlike. 

"Buffy wouldn't like this," Xander said quietly. 

"No," Angel protested. "It's been so long. She didn't know it would be so long." 

Sixteen years, Xander thought, since the world stopped making sense. 

"Please," Angel begged, rising to his knees as he turned to Xander. 

Xander stared over Angel's head at the headstone. 

Elizabeth Anne Summers 

1981-2004 

"Today the sun rose, Buffy we thank you." 

============================================================== 

"Oz how is Willow doing?" Buffy asked, kicking her heels against the tombstone. 

"The doc said she and the baby are doing great. Still after that scare, he wants her to stay in the hospital till the delivery," Oz replied. "Which grave is it?" 

"That one," Buffy said pointing to a patch of unnaturally green grass. "So have you two picked a name?" 

Oz carefully selected a seat at a safe distance from the fresh grave. "You know we won't let the doctors tell whether the baby will be a girl or a boy." 

"So? You've still got to have been talking about it. What are the front runners?" Buffy asked. 

"We wanted to meet the baby first, see what fit," Oz replied. "So what's on the schedule for tonight?" 

"We take care of our friend down there, then a quick patrol, then we go home. Giles doesn't' expect anything big for awhile," Buffy said. 

"Has Giles talked to Xander recently?" Oz asked. 

"Yeah, the council doesn't like it but Xander's still coming home. There's no way a set of stuffed shirts like the Council are going to keep him from personally congratulating two of his closest friends on the birth of their first child." 

The ground in front of Buffy erupted as the newly risen vampire clawed his way to the surface. 

"Back to work," Buffy sighed, hopping from her perch. 

As the vampire freed his upper body from the grave, Buffy leaned over and staked him. For a second the startled vamp just stared at her, then with a shriek it crumbled to dust. 

"I think the council ought to pay me," Buffy said conversationally. "I mean this whole saving the world and holding down a job is just tedious." 

"You over slept again?" Oz asked. 

"Yep, and bosses don't understand saving the world from vampires anymore than teachers did." 

"Bummer," Oz commented. 

"Definitely, and since I can't quit the slaying gig, I think it should be a paid position. Do you think Giles will buy it?" Buffy asked. 

Oz considered her question, "Well, it's not up to just him." 

"And the council would consider it a change, and we all know how the council feels about change," Buffy finished. "So I guess I'll just have to be thankful for a quiet night every now and then, like tonight." 

"Or not," Oz replied, directing Buffy's attention to a small grove of trees near the cemetery gates. And to the fiery hole in reality forming there. 

"There goes the neighborhood," Buffy sighed. 

The demon that came through the portal was predictably ugly and big too; about eight feet tall and covered with heavy gray-green scales. 

"I think this looks like a knife type demon," Buffy commented. 

Oz nodded digging into the duffel bag slung over his shoulder. "Trade?" he asked offering her an ornate knife about the size of a machete. 

"Thanks," Buffy replied handing him her stake as she took the knife. "Okay appearance challenged guy," Buffy addressed the demon. "We have plenty of evil in Sunnydale without you. So why don't you just hop back through your nice little portal there or I'm going to have to hurt you." 

The demon sneered, "Go home little girl, every Slayer who has ever dared stand against me has died." 

"You talk big," Buffy replied. "But I'm not buying." 

With that Buffy attacked. Several of her best kicks left the demon completely unmoved. In fact he was laughing. 

Okay, Buffy thought, it's time to change tactics. This time she attacked with the knife. Her first cut bounced off the demon's scales. When she tried for a second the demon reached up and caught her hand. It twisted her wrist squeezing down like a vise. 

Buffy dropped to her knees as the knife clattered to the pavement. 

"Goodbye Slayer," the demon said, seconds before Oz's mass crashed into its knees throwing it off balance. 

Startled the demon released Buffy. 

"Run!" She yelled. 

============================================================== 

Xander walked through Willow and Oz's front entrance. The door itself was half off its hinges, standing wide open, a bad omen in any town, in Sunnydale it was a license to panic. 

He'd stumbled across Angel's most recent suicide attempt pretty much by accident while patrolling the cemetery. It had never occurred to him that something might have happened to Willow or her family. 

Angrily he glared at the vampire standing silently at his side. Willow gets attacked and he just wanders off. Xander thought. Xander shook his head slightly taking his anger out on Angel was stupid. True there'd been a time when Angel could have protected Willow from most anything Sunnydale tossed at them, but that had been before Buffy's death. Things were different now. 

Other than the front door, the house was undamaged, still Willow Oz and their daughter Beth were gone. 

Hopefully Xander dialed Willow's cell phone number. Two rings later Xander remembered to breathe as the phone was answered. 

"Hello?" Willow's voice wavered. 

"Will, thank God you're all right!" Xander exclaimed. "I saw your door and well you know how things are." 

"Xander, it's Beth," Willow stammered. "We're at the hospital… My baby…the doctors won't say anything. Angel just…" Willow broke down sobbing. 

Xander listened in shock slowly turning to face Angel, who was still standing where Xander had left him. 

"She'll be all right, Will," Xander promised hanging up the phone. 

============================================================== 

"So what are we up against?" Angel asked as soon as Buffy and Giles met him at the Sunnydale bus depot. 

"Big, strong, armored and ugly about sums it up," Buffy replied. 

"Also I can't find anything about it in my books, Willow hasn't had any luck with the Internet." Giles added. 

"How is Willow doing?" Angel asked seriously. 

"She almost miscarried," Buffy answered. "The doctors are keeping her at the hospital until the baby's born. Still the doctors said that the baby might make it even if it were born now, but the longer they wait the better it's chances will be." 

Angel nodded, relieved, he liked Willow, other than Buffy she was the only person he could really count as a friend. Xander and Cordelia would both prefer him dead; Giles and Oz simply tolerated him for Buffy's sake. Willow treated him like a person; she had invited him to her wedding and called him about the pregnancy just like she had done with the rest of her friends. She'd even had the wedding late enough that he'd actually been able to attend. 

When Willow had called about the baby she'd been so happy and excited... Then Angel heard about the problems. He'd been horrified, in his time complicated pregnancies usually killed either the mother or the child, more often than not both died. Angel knew medicine had advance considerably in the centuries since his birth, still he had followed the progression of Willow's pregnancy with a quiet sense of dread. 

"About the demon," Giles said. "We were hoping you would be able to identify it." 

"And if you can't I'll probably need some heavy duty back-up when we try the guess and check method of slayage," Buffy added. 

Angel smiled at her, "Thanks for calling me. I know it's hard for you to have me here, but if anything happened to you I'd die." 

Buffy bit her lip looking very uncomfortable. "You've got your own life now, you'd deal." Buffy's statement wasn't an expression of hope or belief, it was a command. 

Tactfully Angel dropped a subject he and Buffy would never agree on. Angel knew when Buffy died he would either already be dead himself or he would find whatever, whoever, killed her and destroy it, or die trying. After that he'd have no more reason to live. Until then he would continue trying to create a life Buffy would approve of. 

"Let's go find our new friend," Angel said. "The less time he has to accomplish whatever he came to the Hellmouth to do the better." 

Buffy grinned, relieved at the change of topic. "That's us, a pair of workaholics," she said, leading Angel back to her car. 

============================================================== 

"Sorry Buffy," Angel said. "I don't recognize it." 

"Oh dang, I hate guess and check," Buffy replied. 

"Before we rush into this let's talk to Giles." Angel said. "I mean rushing in blindly is always dangerous, at the very least we should be well armed." 

"Oh yeah, heavy artillery," Buffy sighed. 

"I've always been a firm believer in overkill," Angel replied. "Especially if it keeps you safer." 

"Come on Angel you know the rules," Buffy said. "No being sweet or romantic, it's hard enough being around you without additional reminders of what we're not." 

Angel grimaced, the last thing he had ever wanted to do was hurt Buffy, a fact which never seemed to stop him form doing exactly that. 

============================================================== 

Xander stared at Angel, all the hatred he'd ever felt toward the other man building in his mind. 

He'd never liked Angel, never trusted him. For almost two decades Xander had put his personal feeling about Angel aside. It had seemed pretty pointless, pathetic even, to hold a grudge against someone as screwed up as Angel had become. 

"Shows what I know," Xander muttered. "Everything would have been a lot better if Buffy had just staked you when we first found out you were a vampire." 

Angel had to have heard Xander's comments, but he didn't respond he was lost in the past. Trying desperately to piece together the piece of the puzzle that his memories had become. 

Xander continued his monologue, walking to the closet where Willow kept her weapons. "All you've ever done is screw up our lives and now you hurt Willow's daughter…" 

He selected a heavy bat and a stake from the armory Willow and Oz maintained. 

"I should have done this years ago," Xander continued. 

In the split second before the bat connected with his skull Angel finally seemed to realize his situation. In a futile gesture Angel raised his hand to block Xander's blow. 

He was much to late, a second blow and consciousness fled. 

Leaning over his fallen adversary, Xander raised his stake. 

============================================================== 

Xander and Giles had been knocked out of the fight early on. Giles had taken a bad hit and Buffy had ordered Xander to get him out of the line of fire. 

Xander hadn't wanted to leave, "Your just distracting us," Buffy had said. "Get out before you get us all killed." 

Xander did what he was told. He took Giles to the hospital, but he couldn't stay away. Xander had to know how the battle had turned out. 

Cautiously he crept into the High School. He knew the fight was over, the quiet told him that, he didn't know who had won. 

The library was a disaster, but the first thing Xander saw was the big gray scaled demon, lying on the steps, one of Buffy's stakes protruding from it's eye. 

Xander sighed in relief; Buffy and Angel had won once again. As he looked up his breath froze in his throat. In the center of the library Buffy and Angel lay together, a thick river of blood connected them to the demon. 

Slowly, reluctantly Xander walked to Buffy's side. Sleepily she looked up at him. "I'm dying," she said calmly. 

Xander had wanted to argue about that, but the volume of bright red human blood told him she was right. 

Buffy looked back at Angel, reluctantly Xander's glaze followed her's. The way Angel's head rested on the floor was wrong. Xander didn't want to see why, but Buffy's hand was gently turning Angel's face toward hers, revealing the damaged right side of his skull. 

Xander found himself wondering if the dull color of Angel's blood came from him being a vampire or if it were due to the brain matter mixed in. Xander glanced briefly at the heavy library table beside Buffy and Angel. The corner nearest them was covered in Angel's darker colored blood. 

"Xander…" Buffy's voice wavered. Swallowing hard, Xander looked back at them. "Take care of him for me, okay?" 

Buffy's eyes had remained locked on Xander's until he nodded. "I promise," Xander said kneeling beside them. 

Once she had his word Buffy relaxed, seconds later she was dead. 

Numbly Xander moved Angel to the school's boiler room, then he called the police 

The police arrived with Principle Snyder. Xander watched them scurry around the library, carefully avoiding looking at the demon Buffy had killed and he had to suppress a sick urge to giggle. Sunnydale's finest would have been right at home in Hazard County. Except no one ever got murdered there, Xander thought, no one ever had to sacrifice themselves so that the forces of good could win there. 

Xander looked to the center of the room where the medics where placing Buffy's body in a heavy black bag. It wasn't right Xander thought fiercely, Buffy was supposed to be invincible, she couldn't be dead. 

"She always was a trouble maker," Snyder sneered. "I knew she'd come to a bad end." 

"Shut up!" Xander yelled. "You and every other person in this god forsaken town owes her their lives a dozen times over." 

He towered threateningly over the shorter man like a storm cloud. Nervously Snyder backed away from his enraged former student. 

"Sir," one of the police officers said preventing Xander from following Snyder. "We need a statement from you." 

Xander turned his pain and anger on the officer. "Why do you care, isn't it easier to cover up the truth if you never knew what happened in the first place?" 

============================================================== 

Xander had ended up spending that night in jail, he never would remember what they'd charged him with. In the end it didn't matter, the charges were dropped. 

The days that followed Buffy's death passed in fog. Xander had provided Giles with emotional support when they went to tell Joyce Summers how her daughter had died. Joyce had screamed and cried, and blamed them. Giles had tried to comfort her, Joyce responded by ordering them out of her home. After she backed up her request with several thrown objects Giles and Xander left. 

Hank Summers arrived in town the next morning. Talking to him was all but impossible for the Slayerettes, Hank had never learned his daughter's secret, was never any part of their group. He believed the police's theory that a transient had killed Buffy. 

Oz and Willow dealt with their grief by caring for everyone around them. Willow's hospital room rapidly became the center of all activities for Buffy's friends and family. 

Xander relocated Angel to the apartment he maintained in Sunnydale. Giles had stopped by to examine Angel, he wasn't certain that the vampire would ever regain consciousness, given the degree of brain damage he'd suffered. Xander tried to convince himself that he wasn't jealous of Angel, but he wasn't having much luck. Xander wished he had the option of never knowing Buffy had been killed. 

In addition to jealousy, Xander was also fighting equally irrational surges of anger that Angel hadn't done a better job of protecting Buffy. 

No matter his feelings about Angel it never occurred to Xander to abandon the injured vampire. 

Willow's daughter was born two days before the funeral. Oz and Willow named her Elizabeth in memory of the woman who should have been her godmother. 

Funerals were supposed to bring closure, but Buffy's couldn't do that. There were too many lies told there. Joyce stood by herself, too angry to allow Buffy's friends to offer comfort and completely unable to deal with Hank's ignorance. 

The Slayerettes choose the inscription on Buffy's head stone. Hank didn't understand it, but the others had been insistent, they needed some recognition of what Buffy had accomplished in her life, even if it was only a cryptic inscription. 

After the funeral everyone drifted apart. Cordelia returned to her modeling career in LA. Joyce moved out of Sunnydale. Oz and Willow were quickly absorbed by the demands of a new baby. Giles somehow recovered the body of the demon that had killed Buffy and began an exhaustive study of it. 

When the Watcher's council questioned his motives Giles told them he wanted to learn more about it, so that if another Slayer encountered one of its species, she wouldn't be as defenseless as Buffy had been. Still when Giles pictured that future Slayer fighting the demon, she always bore Buffy's face. Giles couldn't quit imagining what might have happened had he been able to better prepare her for the battle. 

Xander threw himself into caring for Angel and took up patrolling Sunnydale. He was supposed to return to England to continue his studies as a Watcher but he couldn't find the motivation. 

For a few months the council left him alone. 

============================================================== 

"Mr. Harris," the annoyingly calm voice said over the phone. 

"That's me," Xander replied abruptly, "What do you want?" 

"You've used up you leave time, the council requires your presence, immediately." 

Xander rolled his eyes; he should have recognized a council flunky by the stuffiness factor. "Screw the council," he almost smiled, knowing how the watcher's representative must be struggling to come up with an appropriate reply. 

"Alexander," the other man said finally. "You knew this would happen someday. I know Buffy Summers was your friend, but Slayers die, inevitably they die young. It's unfortunate but it's the way things are. 

"You've impressed many people with the dedication and energy you've brought to your studies. Alexander, you have a bright future with the Watchers. An opportunity to help another girl like Ms. Summers. Don't throw that away." 

"You know what?" Xander replied slowly, as if he were just realizing what he was saying himself. "I never wanted to help another girl like Buffy. I just wanted to help Buffy herself. You know, when Giles got old and had to retire from the active helping category. I never pictured a future with Buffy dead, but not you guys. To you Buffy dying before her twenty-third birthday was just a statistic. Slayer's die young, but that's okay because there's always another one to replace them right?" 

"Each Slayer's death is regretted, but necessary for the safety of the world." 

"Buffy wasn't just the Slayer!" Xander exclaimed. "She was a person too. She didn't ask to be chosen she had her own plans for her life. Plans that would have gotten her killed when she should have been graduating from college!" 

"Alexander, calm down!" The watcher said. "You know we don't control who is chosen. We prepare them, help them to deal with their destiny, but we don't make the choice." 

"Their destiny, right, one born in each generation with the strength and skills to fight the vampires, what a load of crap! You've known about Angel for years now, why haven't you been trying to figure out how to make more vampires like him. They'd have the strength and skills, and they'd deserve that fate too. 

Given what he's done Angel deserved to die trying to make amends! Buffy didn't. 

Or better yet, why doesn't everyone on the council get off their butts and help? You know Giles and the rest of us were just normal people, well pretty much, but we've all bagged our fair share of monsters over the years, even Cordy. Is the whole watcher's organization comprised of cowards who have to hide behind a teenaged girl?" 

"Mr. Harris, this conversation is accomplishing nothing. I'll call back when you can be more rational." 

"Don't bother, I'm not interested in the job anymore." Xander hung up the phone and returned to collecting his slayage equipment for the night's hunt. 

With Buffy gone and the new Slayer sent to some other Hellmouth, someone had to pick-up the slack, Xander thought, lovingly running his hand over his crossbow. It was a damn good thing he was a decent shot, Xander reflected. He just couldn't manage the up close and personal like Buffy had. 

============================================================== 

"Xander, Angel's getting a lot better," Willow said, balancing her two-year-old daughter on her knee. 

"Yeah the hole in his head closed up real nice, now Deadboy looks just fine. He's still brain dead Will," Xander said without interest. 

"I don't think he is," Willow replied. 

"Don't Will, it's just wishful thinking," Xander said. "There's nothing separating him from a corpse anymore… Except he doesn't rot, thankfully." 

"Xander I used a spell, Angel is in there somewhere," Willow stared intently into Xander's eyes. "I think he knows something happened to Buffy, when he's ready to face that he'll wake up. Angel isn't human, Xander." 

"Big new flash there, Will," Xander snapped. 

"Vampires heal, given enough time. Not just their muscles and bones, nerves tissue heals too. Physically there nothing wrong with Angel anymore," Willow insisted. 

============================================================== 

Xander smiled as he watched Beth pull herself into a standing position. 

Willow and Oz were attending a retirement dinner at the college for one of Willow's professors. Giles was busy, so Xander had baby-sitting duties for the evening. He couldn't have been happier. Since Buffy's death he hadn't been able to let anyone new get close to him. At times he knew he even tried to shut Willow out, thankfully she'd never let him do that. 

Still Xander wondered if it wouldn't be for the best if she did. He never wanted to hurt anyone the way Buffy's dying had hurt him. He wasn't even the Slayer, which never stopped him from going out hunting. Xander was careful, he knew he wasn't Buffy and he wasn't suicidal. Unfortunately the law of averages didn't give a damn about careful. Xander knew if he kept putting himself in danger he'd loose one day. 

Maybe he hadn't realized it at first, but the scar bisecting his torso was a constant reminder of what could happen. He'd gotten lucky that night, several times. Lucky that he had managed to shoot all the vampires he'd been stalking before the one stalking him had pounced. Lucky that the vampire had dropped him near one of his spent crossbow bolts after ripping his stomach open. Luck the vampire had been careless, had assumed that Xander didn't have any fight left in him. Lucky that Mr. Cateran had come to visit his wife's grave that night and had called the ambulance. Xander knew, by all rights, he should have died that night. He's couldn't hope to be that lucky again. 

He would die and the people that cared for him would pay for the choice he'd made the night he decided to try to fill Buffy's place. All Xander could do was try to make sure that he kept down the number of people he hurt. 

It was a lonely way to live, but Willow wouldn't let him shut her out and no one could shut Beth out. The tiny red haired child was so certain of her welcome; it was impossible to let down her faith that everyone loved her. 

"Xan," Beth demanded tugging at his pantleg. 

Xander smiled, then leaned down and swept the tiny three-year-old up into his arms. "How's my favorite girl?" he asked. 

"Hungry," Beth declared firmly. 

Xander laughed softly as he asked, "Doesn't your mother feed you?" 

Beth put on her most serious face. "No," she said plaintively. 

Xander smiled Will would give him hell later, but a little junk food never hurt anyone. If it weren't for him Beth would probably have entered grade school without ever being introduced to the wonders of Hostess snack food. 

============================================================== 

"Xander?" Giles called hopefully, walking through Xander's front door. 

When he realized Xander had taken over patrolling Giles had been adamant that he quit before he got hurt. Over time Giles had been forced to admit he couldn't stop Xander from going hunting, so he'd asked Xander to call him before and afterwards, so if he were injured or taken captive they would know to look for him that night. 

Xander had agreed to the precaution, but sometimes he forgot. Giles prayed that that was what had happened tonight. 

A quick examination of Xander's apartment convinced Giles otherwise. Xander's weapons were still missing from their customary spot. 

Giles went to the phone and dialed Willow and Oz's number. "It's Giles," He said to their machine. "Xander didn't come back from a patrol, I'm going out to look for him now." 

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	2. part 2

**Full Circle (part 2)**

Disclaimer: Characters and Premise are borrowed from the show "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer."

"…didn't come back from a patrol..." 

Buffy? Angel wondered hearing the brief snatch of conversation. Who else would go on a patrol? 

Where was he? How'd he get here? The last thing Angel could remember he'd been in LA there'd been that minor problem with a chaos demon… He'd taken care of that right? 

He could vaguely remember the fight but after that things got foggier… 

Angel opened his eyes and glanced around himself. The bed he was laying on was the only furniture in the room. Angel still didn't recognize where he was, but it was safe, the windows were boarded up. Then Angel noticed the blood bag hanging on a rack near the bed. Idly his eyes traced the tubing down to a needle in his arm. 

Why would anyone do that? He wondered pulling the needle from his arm as he sat up. Carefully Angel stood, his balance felt off somehow. When he tried the door he was irritated to discover it was locked form the outside. 

Angel frowned then placed one had against the door jam and tugged, the wood around the lock splintered, easily giving way. 

He didn't recognize the rest of the apartment either, except for a picture of Buffy, Willow and Xander that had been taken in High School. Buffy kept a copy of that photograph in her room too. From the picture Angel assumed that the apartment belonged to one of Buffy's friends, but why would one of them try to lock him up? It didn't make sense. 

It was secondary, Angel decided. Buffy had gotten in trouble on a patrol; he needed to find her. 

It was really late, Angel realized, well after midnight. He'd have to hurry if he intended to find Buffy before sunrise. 

Angel headed for the cemetery; it was a common place for trouble in Buffy's patrols. Once there he found that he wasn't the first person to think of looking there. Giles had beaten him to it. 

Silently he glided up beside Giles. "Did you find anything?" Angel asked. 

Giles jumped, and then he just stood there staring. 

Angel felt mildly confused and worried; Giles looked old, much older than Angel remembered. Humans did that Angel reminded himself. He had been out of Sunnydale for awhile, but he didn't think it had been that long. 

"Angel?" Giles asked absolutely stunned. 

"Yeah, I don't know how I got back here, but I guess it's a good thing, since Buffy's gotten into trouble," Angel said. 

"It's not Buffy," Giles stammered. "It's Xander." 

"Why was Xander patrolling?" Angel demanded. "Doesn't he know how dangerous that is without Buffy?" 

"Angel, Buffy is…" Giles began, but Angel cut him off. 

"I guess it doesn't matter," he said. Buffy must be looking for Xander too, he thought. Angel considered asking Giles where Buffy was, but something stopped him. 

"We better hurry," Angel said instead. "There's no telling what sort of trouble Harris has gotten himself into." 

It wasn't long before they found the clues they were looking for: Xander's crossbow, gym bag and signs of a scuffle. 

"Whatever it was it must have drug Xander off with it," Angel said. "He's lucky it's been damp lately, we can follow the tracks." 

Giles nodded. They followed the drag marks to one of Sunnydale's many crypts; the door was broken open. Angel motioned that he wanted Giles to stay behind. If Xander and his captor were in there Angel wanted the element of surprise and Giles just wasn't that good at sneaking. 

Angel recognized the bleached blond vampire standing over Xander immediately. He quickly grabbed Spike by the collar of his duster and spun him away from Xander. 

Spike stared at the older vampire in surprise. "Well that's what I get for listening to rumors," he said. 

"What rumors?" Angel asked. 

"That you've been out of the picture since your girl bought it," Spike answered. "Thought it would be fun to visit Dru and I's old stomping grounds." 

What girl, Angel thought. Buffy wasn't dead. 

"Yep," Spike continued blithely, "I thought Sunnyhell would be a right nice town with your Slayer dead." 

"She's not!" Angel yelled slamming the younger vampire into the wall of the crypt. Behind him Angel heard Giles assisting Xander to his feet. 

Angel pulled Spike away from the wall just so he could slam him back against it harder. "Buffy's fine," he shouted. 

Spike was looking at him oddly, "Funny thing, you getting so upset, what with her being fine and all." 

"He's right Lover." 

Angel felt a soft touch on his arm and glanced away from Spike to see Buffy standing beside him. She looked exactly as he remembered her, not a day older, not changed in any way. After Giles that was almost a surprise. 

Well, Angel rationalized; he didn't spend the long hours when he was trapped in his apartment by the sun drawing *Giles'* picture after all. It was only natural his memories of Buffy were more accurate. 

"You really are over-reacting," Buffy continued. "Just stake him then give Giles a hand with Xander." 

"You go on," Angel replied. "I can deal with Spike." 

"Um Mate?" Spike said tentatively. "Who are you talking to?" 

"Buffy," Angel answered looking for a stake. 

When Angel reached back for a huge splinter of the broken door Spike twisted free from his grasp. 

At the door Spike paused looking back at Angel. "You know I think you've gone as loopy as Dru. I hope it doesn't run in the family." 

============================================================== 

Angel was surprised by Buffy's absence when he caught up with Giles and Xander. 

Giles must have asked her to scout for other trouble, Angel reasoned, as he went to help Giles support Xander. 

"So that really was you," Xander commented, letting Angel lift him off a badly sprained ankle. "I gotta say you timed your return to the land of the living perfectly." 

"Buffy would have come," Angel said. "Giles and I just found you first." 

The stunned expression on Xander's face bothered him. 

"Angel," Giles said gently. "Do you remember the demon Buffy asked you to come back to Sunnydale to help her fight?" 

"No, I just woke up here," Angel replied. 

Giles stepped in front of Angel, forcing the vampire to stop and look at him. "The two of you managed to kill it, but the fight went badly. You've been in a coma for three years Angel, and… Buffy…Buffy died during the battle." 

"I saw her," Angel protested, "Just a few minutes ago in the crypt." 

Giles looked alarmed. "Angel, that isn't possible. Buffy has been dead for three years." 

"You're wrong," Angel said looking around for Buffy. Then he saw her, standing by the cemetery gates, waiting for them. 

Angel relaxed and smiled, "See, I told you, she's right over there." 

Xander and Giles exchanged a concerned look. 

"I'm not going to say it," Xander said. 

"Um Angel," Giles said hesitantly. "There's no one there." 

============================================================== 

"Could he be seeing a ghost?" Willow asked. 

"It wouldn't be the first time we've dealt with ghosts on the Hellmouth." Giles said cautiously. 

Angel leaned over and whispered to Buffy, "Are you a ghost?" 

She giggled. "I'd have to have died to be a ghost," Buffy whispered back. 

"So you're not dead?" Angel asked, needing to be clear on that if nothing else. 

"What do you think?" She asked. 

Angel brushed a loose strand of hair back into her ponytail. She turned to face him and he kissed her softly. When he pulled back he was smiling, "Nope, you're definitely not dead," he said. 

"If Buffy's a ghost, why hasn't she shown up before now?" Xander asked. "And why's Deadboy the only one who sees her?" 

Oz shrugged, "Your second question kinda answers the first. Buffy could have been here as a ghost all this time, but no one saw her till Angel woke up." 

"Why can't they see you?" Angel asked. 

Buffy shrugged dismissively. Angel decided that if she wasn't worried he shouldn't let it bother him either. 

"I know," Willow said. "There's a spell to show if a place is haunted. I could check if there are any ghosts here." 

============================================================== 

"Well?" Giles asked. 

"No ghosts," Willow replied sadly. "Angel are you sure she's here?" 

Angel glanced down at Buffy; she'd snuggled up against him and fallen asleep hours ago. "She's here," Angel said nudging her awake. "Willow's spell didn't work," he told her. 

"'Course," Buffy said sleepily. "I'm not a ghost 'member? I told you that." 

"Maybe I did the spell wrong," Willow suggested. 

"Maybe Deadboy's head didn't heal right," Xander said bitterly. 

============================================================== 

"Hi Angel," Beth said. "Is Buffy here?" 

Angel smiled at the six-year-old. He thought it was really sweet of Willow and Oz to name their daughter after Buffy. He just wished he could explain to them that Buffy wasn't really dead. 

"Naw, she went on patrol tonight," Angel replied. 

"Zackery's here," Beth said, "He likes visiting you and Xander." 

"Hey Zack," Angel said directing his greeting toward the spot Zackery usually occupied, about two feet off Beth's left shoulder. He couldn't see Zackery, but Beth couldn't see Buffy, so Angel was willing to accept that he was here on faith. Beth accepted Buffy on faith, which was a lot more than the others did. 

Angel knew the most popular theory was that he was insane. Oh, no one except Xander said that straight out, but it wasn't hard to miss that they thought it either. Buffy found the whole thing immensely entertaining, Angel was starting to get annoyed. 

Xander wouldn't quit patrolling without Buffy, so Angel had to go with him. Of the entire lot of them Xander was the most annoying, but Angel couldn't let him patrol alone, Buffy wouldn't like it if anything happened to her old friend. 

On her advice he was still living at Xander apartment as well. He had decided to go back to the mansion last year, but everyone had been firmly against that idea. Angel would have gone anyway except Buffy had pointed out that it was easier to make sure Xander didn't go back to hunting alone that way. 

Also it wasn't worth upsetting everyone over anyway, and they didn't trust him to watch Beth alone. 

"How is school going?" Angel asked. 

Beth made a face; it was common knowledge that she despised first grade. "First, it's boring," she said. "All we do is little kid stuff. Zack and I can read way bigger books than `Look at Spot. Look at Spot run.' Second, everyone's mean. Third, I'm in trouble again. That's why Mom and Dad had to go have another talk with Mrs. Minch." 

Angel carefully hid a smile, as he sat down. Beth confidently climbed into his lap and made herself at home. "What happened this time?" Angel asked. 

Beth sighed tragically, "Marcy wouldn't let me on the swing, so I started pushing her, once the swing started going really high I told her about the Harpies. That's all Angel, really." 

"What did you tell her about Harpies?" Angel asked 

Beth looked up at him a perfect picture of innocence. "That they like to steel people from swings and take them up ballzions of feet in the air, then drop them so they go splat." 

"Oh, did Marcy get off the swing then?" Angel asked, striving for an appropriately disapproving tone. He wasn't supposed to encourage her in mischief. Not even when Beth's brand of mischief was so brilliant. 

"Well she wanted to," Beth answered thoughtfully. "But I was having such a good time pushing her I forgot to let her get off." 

============================================================== 

"Beth is an incredibly bright child," Mrs. Minch began. "However her imagination is somewhat disturbing. Beth uses her stories of monsters to terrify the other children." 

Willow and Oz exchanged a look, growing up in their circle of friends it came as little surprise that monsters and the like were very much on Beth's mind. 

"Then there's the matter of her imaginary friend, Zackery," Mrs. Minch continued. "Beth's still quiet young, but I'm concerned by the conviction she displays in Zackery's reality. I'm afraid her belief in him prevents her from developing real friendships. 

"Furthermore whenever Zackery's reality is questioned Beth simply answers that Angel believes in him." 

Willow and Oz glanced at one another again. 

"Who is this Angel?" Mrs. Minch asked. "I checked the school's records, there are no children with that name." 

"Angel is a friend of the family," Willow answered. 

"How old is Angel? From the way Beth talks about him I assume he's considerably older than she is," Mrs. Minch asked. 

Again Willow and Oz shared a look this time trying to decide discretely who should come up with an answer, obviously they had to lie and it would be uncomfortable if they blurted out different ages. 

"Sometimes older children or adults find it cute to encourage a younger child in their belief in an imaginary friend," Mrs. Minch continued. "However it would be best if you asked him to cease this practice." 

============================================================== 

"Just asking isn't gonna work," Oz said. 

"I know," Willow replied. "As long as we can't explain why he sees Buffy, he's going to support Beth about Zackery." 

"I guess that's our answer then," Oz said. "We have to get Angel to realize that Buffy isn't really there." 

"But what if she is?" Willow asked. "Hellmouth and everything, you know a lot of unexplainable things happen here. I mean what would Mrs. Minch think if we told her I'm a practicing witch or that you're a werewolf? Huh?" 

"Willow, I know you don't like the idea that Angel might just be seeing things, but haven't you noticed how Angel always sees Buffy the instant we start trying to convince him she's dead? And give yourself some credit, you've been looking for some proof of what Angel sees for years. If there was anything to find, you'd have found it by now." 

============================================================== 

Willow sat down across from Angel. Oz, Xander and Giles sat or stood self-consciously around the room. 

"Angel you trust me right?" Willow started. 

"Of course," Angel answered tensely. He relaxed as Buffy's slender arms wrapped around his shoulders. She stood behind his chair; casually she leaned into him. 

"Miss me lover?" she asked. A smile flitted across Angel's face, but he didn't answer, he'd learned it just caused problems if he and Buffy talked while the others were around and from Willow's tone Angel knew he already was in trouble. 

"You know I'd never lie to you or try to hurt you," Willow continued. 

This time Angel just waited for her to get to her point. 

"I've tried to figure out what's there when you see Buffy for three years Angel. I looked hard, but there's nothing for me to find. Angel, Buffy died years ago, you have to accept that. I saw her body, we all did. Xander was with her when she died. Angel we know Buffy died." 

Tears filled Willow's eyes, slowly spilling down her cheeks. "If there had been any doubt we would have looked into it. I know you don't want to hear this, I didn't want to believe it either, but Buffy is gone." 

Angel sighed, "Willow, I hear her. I see her. I can touch her. I can even smell that flowery soap Buffy always uses. I know you're trying to help me, that you believe what you say, but you're wrong. Buffy's alive and well. She's here right now." 

"This is pointless," Xander muttered. 

Giles took off his glasses and polished them absently. "Angel, when did Buffy come in?" 

"Just a few minutes ago." 

"Did she come through the door, for the kitchen, the hall, the garage?" 

"I was watching all of you do your concerned thing. I didn't notice, sue me." 

"Where does she go when she's not with you?" 

"Around, she has a life." 

"What life? Where does she work? Where does she live? Have you seen her eat lately?" 

"I don't know! I don't ask!" 

"Shh…. Relax," Buffy said. "They're confused, don't get mad." 

Angel closed his eyes briefly; he reached up to clasp Buffy's hand. 

Oz looked at Angel's hand resting a fraction of an inch above his shoulder. "You think she's by you," he said. "Her hand's on you shoulder, right?" 

"Yeah," Angel said. 

"Okay," Oz said walking to Angel's side. Angel started to turn to him, pulling away from Buffy. "No, don't move, either of you. I have an idea." 

Angel shrugged then watched curiously as Oz tried to force his hand down to his shoulder. 

"Okay," Oz said a few moments later. "I'm guessing that this would work better if you were human." 

"It would work better if Buffy's hand wasn't in the way," Angel replied. 

"Well that's one way to look at it," Oz said. "But for my curiosity's sake just hold your arm out and try not to let me move it." 

"You know, " Oz said after a few tries. "It would make me feel better if you a least looked like it was an effort for you to stop me." 

Angel half-smiled. "Sorry, it's the whole vampire strength thing." 

"Well, I'm out of ideas," Oz said retaking his seat. 

"I've got one," Xander said softly. "It's not a good one, but at least Angel gets some proof, since that's what he needs." 

"What do you want to do?" Giles asked. 

"We show him Buffy, the real one, not the figment of his imagination," Xander said coldly. 

"But… but…" Willow stammered. "I don't think we should do that. It's a bad idea, a very bad idea." 

Xander turned his attention to Angel. "Come on lets end it. I'm sick of you stirring up old memories." 

"She's not dead," Angel replied calmly. 

"Then you shouldn't have a problem with digging up her grave," Xander challenged. 

Angel met Xander's eyes evenly. "Let's do it." 

"Angel," Buffy protested weakly. 

"He's right," Angel told her. "This has gone on too long, we need to end it." 

============================================================== 

Xander stepped back from the open grave. "You do the honors," he said. 

Angel hesitated, Buffy had refused to come here with him and now the icy determination to prove Xander wrong was giving way to doubts. 

"Do it," Xander insisted. "Or I will, we've gone to far to turn back now." 

Angel nodded then threw the casket lid open. 

Even after six years the body was recognizable, the mortician had done a good job of preserving her body. Angel wanted to say it wasn't her, but the words wouldn't come. Delicately he lifted her hand. They'd buried her with the claddagh ring. 

"You gave that to her didn't you?" Xander asked quietly. "She never took it off." 

Angel traced a slight scratch in the ring's surface. "I remember how upset she was when it got damaged. A lizard thing bashed her hand against a concrete wall, when she noticed the scratch it never had a chance." 

Angel gently set her hand down and knelt by the casket, "How did she die? Why didn't I protect her?" 

============================================================== 

"They should be back by now," Giles said. 

"It's almost dawn," Willow added with concern. "I knew this was a bad idea." 

"I'm going to go get them," Giles said. "They walked, if worst comes to worst Angel can take shelter in the trunk." 

"Oz stay with Beth, I'm going with Giles," Willow said. 

"Got it." 

============================================================== 

"We should have just left things alone," Willow said softly as they drove to the cemetery. "It wasn't that bad. I never should have let that Mrs. Minch worry me, she just doesn't understand Beth." 

"Willow, quit it. We did what we thought was best. Furthermore, we don't even know how this will turn out yet. Let's get there and see what has kept them before we start recriminations." 

============================================================== 

Xander glanced nervously at the increasingly bright sky, then back at Angel. "Please listen to me, we've got to get out of here." 

If Angel heard it wasn't apparent, he remained kneeling beside the casket, lost in grief. Every few moments his body would be caught in a spasm of shaking. 

At first Xander had been afraid that Angel was crying, now he wished it were something that normal. Xander just didn't know how to deal with Angel's silent shuttering. 

For the first few minutes after Angel had acknowledged Buffy's death, Xander had believed he would be able to handle it. Until Angel asked why he was alive if Buffy was dead. 

Nothing Xander had said had after that reached Angel. As the night had worn on it seemed more and more that Angel didn't even hear him. Any moment now the sun would be rising. 

Xander tried to forcibly turn Angel away from the coffin, and like Oz earlier that night, found that Angel was simply too strong. Xander checked the horizon again and was relieved to see Giles and Willow approaching. 

"Guys, thank God you're here, we've got to get Angel inside," Xander said. 

Giles nodded walking past Xander to Angel. "Angel? Angel!" Giles frowned; Angel's attention was totally fixated on Buffy's corpse. 

"Help me close this," Giles asked Xander. With the casket closed Angel's tracelike state seemed to lessen. "Angel," Giles repeated firmly. "The sun is rising you have to take shelter." 

"No," Angel replied distractedly, he was still staring at the casket. Gently he brushed his fingertips across the surface. Blood red tears trickled down his pale cheeks. 

Willow moved to stand beside Angel, she hugged him comfortingly. "We all miss her," she told him. 

"It's not right," Angel said, the dull, lifeless quality of his voice was frightening. "I should have died before letting her get hurt. I failed her." 

"No Angel," Willow protested, shock and empathy filling her voice. "You did everything you could, more than Buffy would have ever asked of you." 

"I failed her, I should die," Angel stated dully. 

============================================================== 

Oz hurried to help Giles and Xander support Angel's unconscious body. "What happened?" He asked. 

Giles answered reluctantly, "He knows Buffy's dead now. He wants to kill himself." 

"He did that to himself?" Oz asked, nodding toward Angel's slumped form. 

Willow, trailing behind the others blushed. 

"Nope," Xander answered. "Angel decided to watch the sunrise, Will changed his mind with a shovel," the grim tone of his voice didn't match his less than serious comments. 

"It's not over," Willow said tiredly. "What are we going to do when he wakes up?" 

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	3. part 3

**Full Circle (part 3)**

Disclaimer: Characters and Premise are borrowed from the show "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer."

Xander shook Willow's shoulder lightly, "Go upstairs, get some sleep, I'll watch him." 

Willow smiled sadly up at him, there were dark hollows under her eyes. "Thanks," she mouthed. 

After Willow left, Xander took her seat; grudgingly turning his attention to the basement's other occupant. 

There had been an obvious and ready solution to their problem with Angel, and as distasteful as if was they had used it. 

There were already restraints in Willow and Oz's basement for Oz's werewolfism. It had only taken a few minutes to sun proof the room for Angel. 

Willow had called it, "Just a safety measure, until we can talk some sense into him." That had been four weeks ago. 

Angel lay crumpled on the floor in the corner. A thin stream of blood trickled from the broken scabs on his wrist. Willow had wrapped a heavy layer of duct tape around the manacles, but Angel's struggles against the restraints were still violent enough to break his skin, if not the chains that bound him. 

The chains prevented Angel from bringing matters to a fiery end, but they weren't conducive to calm rational discussion. And they didn't prevent Angel from taking a slower, uglier path to suicide. 

When Angel had originally announced his intentions, Giles and Xander had dismissed them without concern. Soul or no-soul Angel was a vampire, the two watchers were certain he wouldn't be able to control the hunger well enough to actually starve himself to death. Who ever heard of an anorexic vampire? 

Now Xander couldn't be quite as flip. Angel had violently rejected any blood offered to him. Xander was certain the hunger was tearing Angel apart, he hadn't been able to return to his human features in over a week. Even through the distortion of Angel's vamped out state, Xander could see evidence of sever weight loss in the vampire. 

Angel woke shortly before nightfall. Gingerly he pulled himself into a sitting position. 

"You know Buffy would be furious if she knew what you're trying," Xander said. 

Angel snarled at Xander. 

Frustrated Xander yelled, "Can't you even respond like a rational being?" 

Angel turned his attention to the chains again, methodically testing each link. 

"Buffy was our friend too," Xander continued, anger growing. "What gives you the right to do this? We hurt too. We dealt, why won't you even try? Buffy wanted us to take care of you, why won't you help? It was her last wish. Why do you have to screw it up?" 

"Because the rest of you had some purpose in life beyond her." A loudly dressed individual coming down the stairs said. 

"Who are you?" Xander demanded. 

"Whistler," the stranger replied, turning his attention to Angel. "Sometimes I wonder why I ever bothered with you. No scratch that, most of the time I wonder about that. A real waste of time it's been trying to save your miserable life. You know I should have left you in that ally. At least then no one cared about you enough to be hurt by this self-destructive kick you're on." 

Angel ignored the other demon as totally as he had ignored Xander. Disgusted Whistler turned to Xander. "Try to do a good deed and look where it leads. You know I thought I'd give Angel there a chance to redeem himself, give the world another protector, and give the Slayer an ally, an all around win for everyone. Only Angel goes and gets everything confused, instead of looking at this as a chance to pay back the world for the damage he's done, he falls in love with your Slayer. I saw what was happening right from the first ya know, still I figured what the heck, it gives him a little extra incentive to help her, what's the harm. I mean Angel's not some high school kid who's never been in love before, he can handle it." 

Xander interrupted with a bitter snort, "I guess that theory didn't pan out." 

Whistler gave Xander an annoyed glance; "The theory was fine it was my initial premise that was faulty." 

Xander looked confused. 

Whistler sighed, "Before Buffy, Angel never had been in love. The mortal he'd been was too much of an immature child to truly love, and that first century after the curse, well let's just say Angel was much too busy loathing himself to feel anything else. The demon Angelus, he's not really Angel, so that century and a half just doesn't count." 

Whistler addressed Angel again. "You hear me, Angel-boy, you've had more chances than anyone has a right to and you waste everyone of them. You've been around for two hundred and fifty odd years now, and you've used maybe ten of those years to do something worth while. Percentage wise that's not much to brag about." 

"I'm tired of hurting," Angel grated out. "I just want the pain to stop." 

Whistler's face softened slightly. "Kid, I wish that were an option for you." 

============================================================== 

Whistler shut the basement door behind him firmly, then turned to the expectant faces waiting for him. "I got through to him once," He said. "At least enough to get him to go see Buffy that first times, but where ever Angel is now, I can't reach him." 

Willow glared at him. "So you're giving up?" she demanded. 

Whistler sighed, "Listen kiddies, I like Angel, I really do. I truly wish his life could go a bit smoother, but sometimes things don't work out. People get hurt. I can't help Angel 'cause nothing in him wants help right now. 

"I've seen Angel in his moods before. Indulging in the whole guilt and brooding thing he's so good at to an extent you can't imagine. This isn't that, it's like his soul's gone, but the demon is gone too. Like the pain ate up everything else. I don't know how to help him, and I don't want to watch a kid I'm fond of drown. So yeah, I'm giving up. I know a lost cause when I see one." 

============================================================== 

"I want Angel!" Beth screamed pushing herself free of her mother's embrace. 

"Honey, Angel's sick," Willow said. 

"He's been sick forever," Beth protested. "I want him to get better." 

"So do I," Willow replied tiredly. 

============================================================== 

Two weeks after Whistler's visit Xander sedated Angel, and then he hooked up the IV, just like he had while Angel had been in the coma. There was only one slight difference, this time Xander spiked the blood with medication to keep Angel asleep. 

Xander's idea didn't go over well with the others, but since no one had a better one, no one unhooked the IV either. 

About the same time Willow started spending a lot of time alone with her spell books. 

============================================================== 

"Your spell will erase Angel's memories?" Giles asked. 

Willow nodded, "It will be like a fresh start." 

"All of his memories?" Xander pressed. "Cause if that's the case I see a major problem with this plan, namely you'll break the curse. I mean if Angel doesn't remember what Angelus did he won't feel remorse about it and poof, no more soul." 

Willow rolled her eyes. "Of course, I thought of that," she said. "You honestly thought it took me six months to research a simple little amnesia spell? I studied the curse backwards and forwards, I found every possible loophole in it and I can fix them. I get rid of the happiness clause; I can even get rid of the bloodlust. This spell will really help him. Angel will still be a vampire, but the guilt, the pain, all of that will be gone." 

"It seems like you're planning on destroying pretty much everything that makes him Angel," Oz said. "He won't really be the same person if we remove everything Angel experienced, but it's better than just leaving him drugged for the rest of our lives. I vote for Willow's spell." 

"You're sure that you can prevent his soul from being lost?" Giles asked. 

"Do you think I'd even bring this up if I weren't?" Willow asked with exasperation. "I want to help Angel, not destroy him and release that demon on the world again." 

"I apologize Willow," Giles said. "And Oz is corrected anything is preferable to our current solution." 

Xander shrugged, "I don't see what's so bad about my solution. Deadboy's alive, sort of, and we're taking care of him like Buffy asked. Plus we don't have to worry about him going postal on us. Still I'm out voted, go ahead and cast the spell." 

============================================================== 

"Angel?" Willow asked. 

The vampire's dark eyes slowly focused on the woman sitting next to him. He looked confused and afraid. 

"It's going to be all right Angel," Willow promised. 

Silently he mouthed her words, the confusion apparent in his face deepening. "Right?" Angel's broken voice made the word an accusation and a denial. 

"I'm sorry," Willow sobbed taking his hand. "I wanted to help." 

Angel's eyes lost focus as his concentration turned inward, all he found where shattered fragments of memory, of self. Even those broken images were slipping away into a dense fog. 

"Angel, will you eat something?" Willow asked reclaiming the vampire's wandering attention. 

He shrugged. 

"Oz, go get the… the…" Willow stammered. 

"I know," Oz said walking back up the stairs. 

Oz returned with a mug of warmed blood as well as Xander and Giles. 

Willow helped Angel to a sitting position and Oz handed him the mug. Angel winced at the taste. 

"Please?" Willow asked. 

Angel glanced at her again then drank. A sigh of relief passed through the room. 

Quietly Oz removed the heavy chains binding the vampire. 

"It's a little early for that isn't it?" Xander said. 

"We'll just keep an eye on him for awhile," Willow whispered. 

"Who?" Angel asked glancing around the room nervously. 

"Oh, um, I'm Willow, that's Oz, Xander and Giles," Willow stammered. "We're your friends." 

"No," Angel replied. "Who am I?" 

============================================================== 

Beth watched nervously as her mother curled up in a corner of the couch and sobbed. "Mommy?" she asked in a frightened voice. 

"Everything's all right," Willow said pulling herself together. 

Beth stared at her; every line of her body betrayed tension and disbelief. People didn't cry when everything was all right! 

Willow hugged her daughter tightly. "I'm sorry I'm scaring you," She whispered. "It's just been a bad day, but things are going to get better now." 

"Would you like to see Angel?" Willow asked once Beth had relaxed. 

Beth nodded grinning brightly, Willow's offer completely distracting her. 

Willow squelched a flicker of apprehension and led Beth to the basement. 

Angel sat quietly on the edge of his cot staring at his hands. 

"Angel!" Beth shrieked happily, breaking free of her mother to climb into Angel's arms. 

Angel sat passively as the bubbly seven-year-old perched herself confidently on his lap. 

"You're better now," Beth exclaimed. "You've been sick forever and ever. I wanted to come see you but mom and dad wouldn't let me. I told them and told them you'd feel better if I visited but they said no." 

Angel glanced up at Willow, overwhelmed and confused by the exuberant child. Willow couldn't meet his eyes. 

"I missed you," Beth confided hugging Angel tightly. "You are all better now?" 

"I'm better," Angel replied, his words were still hesitant and uncertain. "There's a lot I can't remember, but it's okay," Angel's comment was directed as much to Willow as to the small girl in his arms. 

"You remember me don't you?" Beth asked staring up at him with hopeful eyes. 

For a long time Angel just stared back down at the child who so obviously trusted and cared for him deeply. 

As the silence stretched out between them Beth's chin quivered and her eyes filled with tears. 

Tentatively Angel drew her into a gentle embrace. "I remember you," Angel said. "Bits and pieces, pictures of you are still with me, but I forgot most of the details, I'm so sorry." 

Beth pulled away from Angel's chest to look up at his face, tear tracks marring her cheeks. Carefully Angel wiped away her tears. 

"You still like me?" Beth asked, new tears welling up to replace those Angel had wiped away. 

Angel hugged the tiny red head more firmly than before. "Of course I still like you, nothing changes that." Angel grinned as an odd fragment of memory was found of this child standing before him scuffing a nervous tow behind herself looking anywhere in the room but at him. "I just don't remember what mischief you've been up to." 

Reassured, Beth snuggled happily against him, and proceeded to catch Angel up with every aspect of her life. 

Willow smiled gratefully at Angel as she slowly retreated to the living room. 

============================================================== 

"Angel?" The questioning voice disrupted his concentration allowing the image of the petite blond woman to escape into the clouded recesses of his memory once more. 

Angel sighed then brightened as he recognized the voice that had intruded into his thoughts. 

"Hi Beth," he said smiling as his eyes slid open. "How was school?" 

Beth slumped dramatically on to Angel's couch, "Horrible," she exclaimed. "Pop quiz in social studies." 

"So?" Angel asked with a shrug. "You're like Willow, good at that stuff." 

"I am, but Ros isn't," Beth replied. "The whole rest of the day all she does is moan about the unfairness of pop quizzes." 

Angel made a sympathetic face at her; he'd met Beth's friend Rosaline several months ago. She made him uncomfortable. Beth said Rosaline had a crush on him. Angel wished she'd get over it. 

Most of the time he found her irritating, the whole idea of kissing a girl was just ick, except for his girl, the one he wanted so badly to remember. Rosaline wasn't her, though. He didn't want Rosaline. 

He could remember the girl he loved. He remembered her kissing him at a skating rink, he knew that kiss had been special, but he couldn't think why it was so important. The pictures of her that he found in his mind were filled with emotions, tumulus, confusing, overwhelming. Want and need, incredible happiness, but also loss and regret. She meant everything to him, but there were so many holes and she only came in dreams and scrapes of memory 

He wished she'd really come. Sometimes he'd try to look for her, but his friends got really upset when he did that. They wouldn't help him look for her, no matter how he asked. He'd tried sneaking out of the house to look for her only last night. Xander had been really mad at him about that. 

============================================================= 

"Xander, you shouldn't yell at Angel," Giles said. "You know it only confuses him." 

"I know," Xander sighed. "It's just that I worry, we almost didn't find him before sunrise this time. You know sometimes I think he doesn't understand that it's a dander to him." 

"He doesn't," Oz replied, "We've explained it to him but it doesn't sink in. He knows what we tell him, when he remembers, but it doesn't make sense to him. We go out in the sun, he won't understand why it would hurt him when it doesn't hurt us." 

"Yes," Giles said. "In many ways he's become like a small child. Willow and I are going over her spell, but we're still not sure why it effected him like it did. We knew there was a possibility that his mental age would be affected by wiping his memory. 

"The depth to which the spell effects a person varies depending on the person. Still even in the worst-case scenario time and new experiences should have returned him to functional adult personality. We knew it was possible that he would be very different from the person we had known, but nothing like this was anticipated. 

"Rather than erasing him memories the spell seems to have damaged Angel's ability to access long term memories. What he does remember is fragmentary and shifting." 

"But some things are constant." Oz pointed out. 

"Yes he always retains a vague memory of Buffy, judging from the frequency of his questions about her. He never remembers being a vampire, in fact I believe he purposely blocks all memories of the atrocities he committed while soulless." Giles said. "Although he does seem to remember other things from those parts of his life. His drawings clearly show Spike and Darla in earlier centuries. The same is most likely true of those of Drucillia as well, however; since her style of dress has not significantly changed since she was turned it is more difficult to tell." 

"I've noticed that, but it's not like he's remembering those centuries, it's like he's living them," Oz said. "Sometimes he's perfectly comfortable playing computer games with Beth, other times he wants to know how cars move without horses." 

"And he always asks why we get older," Xander added. "He finds our high school pictures and starts asking why we look different. Angel says that's how we're supposed to look, it upsets him that we've changed. And I refuse to try to explain aging to him again. I'll go crazy if I do that again." 

"That makes sense actually," Giles said. "For centuries the only creatures he maintained prolonged relationships with were vampires and their appearance wouldn't have changed with time. I doubt Angel has been around humans long enough to observe the aging process since he was mortal himself. 

"But it doesn't bother him that Beth gets older," Xander said. "And Angel remembers everything to do with her since the spell was cast." 

"Yes, Willow and I also find that confusing." Giles replied. "It seems that Angel makes an extra effort to remember Beth. Willow has mentioned that Beth became visibly upset when he couldn't remember her immediately following the spell. Which explains his motivation in remembering her. Angel is very sensitive to the emotions of people around him now. Another reason why you should refrain from yelling at him, Xander. What it doesn't explain is how he can access all of his post-spell memories of Beth, while he is incapable of doing the same with any other subject. 

============================================================== 

Her name was Buffy, Angel realized with delight, the young woman, the person he loved was called Buffy. She liked to go to a place called the Bronze. He used to go there to watch her; he'd danced with her there. 

He was supposed to protect her, he couldn't do that if he wasn't with her. Quietly Angel left the house. 

============================================================== 

Beth sighed as she spotted Angel entering Sunnydale's perennial teen hangout. 

Her friends looked around to see what had caught her attention. Beth grimaced at the looks some of the girls were giving Angel. 

She would have liked to just have Angel hang out with her and her friends until she was ready to go home, but it wasn't fair to force him to deal with the amorous intentions of a bunch of sixteen-year-old girls. 

It would probably be better to just take him home. 

"Ros, would you mind giving Angel and I a ride home?" Beth asked. 

"What? You're family's nutcase got out again?" Ros snapped. 

"Grow up, Ros," Beth said irritably. "You're just mad because Angel doesn't like it when you try to flirt with him." 

"You know it's a real waste that someone that good looking is so mentally challenged," Ros said. 

"Why am I friends with you anyway?" Beth snapped. "It's not like I actually like you." 

Angel had been part of her life as long as Beth could remember. When she had been little he used to make her feel safe. She hated it when people were mean to him. 

He wasn't okay mentally, she knew that, but Ros didn't have to be such a jerk. Beth liked Angel better anyway, he was always nice. 

Beth thought about calling her parents, walking home after dark in Sunnydale wasn't safe. Still she'd have Angel with her, and the demons seemed reluctant to attack him. In all the times he'd wandered off, he'd never been hurt. Besides that Beth didn't want to hang around the Bronze listening to Ros' stupid comments for a minute longer. 

"Angel!" Beth yelled over the noise of the crowd as she joined the dark haired vampire. 

"Beth?" he asked, "Have you seen Buffy?" 

Beth bit her lip; this was looking like it was going to be a bad night. "No, she's not here tonight. We should go home." 

"I need to find her," Angel said. 

Damn Beth thought, he's really out of it. "I'm walking home, you should come with me, maybe we'll run into her on the way." 

"You shouldn't," Angel said. "It's dangerous." 

"That's why you should walk with me," Beth wheeled. 

"You're sure Buffy isn't coming to the Bronze tonight?" Angel asked. "She usually does." 

"I'm sure," Beth said taking his arm and leaving the club. 

Once they were outside Beth noticed a difference in Angel; he seemed more focused than was usual. Aware of is surroundings and on his guard. If this was what he was like when he went looking for Buffy, Beth thought, it was no wonder he didn't get attacked. Angel actually looked dangerous. 

Even so, Beth knew that even when Angel and Buffy used to fight together, when he'd really been okay, Sunnydale's vampires'd still attack them. No matter, how formidable Angel seemed it really wasn't a good idea to be out at night. 

Still, lots of kids walked at night in Sunnydale safely, at least once anyway. 

============================================================== 

Angel sensed the demon about two blocks from Willow and Oz's home. Its presence was disturbingly familiar, the smell of it, the way it moved, it struck cords in his memory that screamed danger. 

Quietly Angel urged Beth to hurry. Then he saw it, a towering blocky demon, armored with heavy scales and gray-green in color. Angel froze, he knew this creature, but he didn't want to remember, he needed to not remember. 

It was evil; Buffy had had to ask him to come back to help her fight it. It was important that he destroyed it. 

"Beth go home, tell your parents about the demon. I'm going to need help to destroy it." 

"Angel we should both go. We don't fight demons," Beth argued. 

"I do, but I need help. Go!" Angel ordered firmly. He never glanced away from the demon. 

Beth hesitantly backed away as Angel attacked the creature. 

The demon tossed Angel away with an almost contemptuous gesture. "Vampire, you are an annoyance," it said. 

Angel snarled and collected himself for another attack. Several yards away Beth watched in terror as they exchanged blows. She could see that the demon was much stronger than Angel. After knocking Angel to the ground once again the demon pinned him there with a heavily clawed hand pressed to his throat, while it searched the surrounding ground for a stake." 

"Leave him alone!" Beth yelled charging the demon. Casually it swatted her away. Angel took advantage of its momentary distraction and escaped its grasp. He scooped up Beth's still form and ran for safety. 

Free of distractions the demon went back to it's business. 

============================================================== 

Upon reaching Willow and Oz's home Angel simply kicked the door open and deposited Beth in her father's arms. 

"The demon that killed Buffy is back," Angel announced. "It hit Beth, I'm not sure how badly hurt she is, you should take her to a hospital. I'll keep track of the demon. Get Giles, I need to know how we killed it before." 

Angel turned and walked back into the night. For the first time in years his mind was clear, focused by purpose. But he could sense the fog at the edges, waiting to reclaim him, as did his despair over Buffy's death. 

Angel returned to the site of his battle with the demon, only to find it had moved on. As he searched unsuccessfully for the creature his sense of purpose became less defined, allowing the demons in his mind to close in on him once again. 

Random wandering brought him to Buffy's grave; there the despair out raced the comforting vagueness of the fog and consumed him. 

============================================================== 

"Take care of him," Xander could almost hear Buffy's voice demanding his promise, as he raised his stake over Angel's heart. 

"He hurt Beth," Xander reminded himself, but still he couldn't bring himself to lower the stake. In the background the phone began to ring. 

As Xander fought his promise to Buffy, the answering machine activated. Xander recognized Oz's voice on the line. "Xander don't, it's not what you're thinking. Pick up the phone now! Angel didn't hurt Beth. Pick up the phone." 

Xander sighed, dropping the stake and turned to reach for the phone. 

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	4. part 4

**Full Cicle (epilog)**

Disclaimer: Characters and Premise are borrowed from the show "Buffy, the Vampire Slayer."

Oz looked around the room at Giles, Willow, Xander and Angel, thinking that they ended up holding way too many of these emergency room conferences. 

"Beth is going to be fine," Willow said. "She woke up and there doesn't seem to be any serious damage done. What was she thinking trying to walk anywhere at night in Sunnydale?" 

"Angel you said that the demon that killed Buffy was back," Oz said. "Angel! Come on, you were with us just a moment ago." 

Slowly Angel returned his focus to the little group of friends. "It's hard, staying here, in the present," he apologized. "The demon, it's the same as the one that killed Buffy, when I saw it everything fell into place." 

"Even after all my studies the only vulnerabilities I ever found were the eyes," Giles said. "Xander do you think you would be able to shoot it in the eye? You're the only one of us who uses a crossbow regularly any more and I don't want to get involved in hand-to-hand combat with this creature, we've all seen how that comes out." 

"I have to try," Xander replied. "It's a smaller target that a heart, but more visible. It's should be that much harder." 

"I'm coming," Angel said. 

"Angel, I don't believe that's wise," Giles said. "You're having difficulty following a conversation, having your attention drift off during a fight would be deadly." 

"Fighting that thing focuses me," Angel replied. "I'll be fine, and if things go wrong I might be able to give Xander a chance at a second shot. I'm really the only one who could even slow it down in a fight." 

============================================================== 

They found the demon at the Restfield Cemetery. Xander's first shot clattered off its eye ridges. As he reloaded the crossbow the demon sketched a circle in the night sky. Behind it's finger a ring of flame formed. 

"I recognize this," Oz said. 

"Come on," Xander muttered. "Turn around, give me one more shot." 

Then the demon stepped through the flaming portal it had created. 

Angel broke away from the group to chase after it. 

He stepped through the port to find himself still in the cemetery, but now it was Buffy and Oz, rather than Xander and Oz who faced the demon with him. 

"Not again," Angel exclaimed. "I can't loose it now." 

"Angel," Buffy cried with surprise. 

"We have to target the eyes," Angel instructed. 

Angel grabbed the demon's arms, restraining it for only a second before it tossed him away. But that was long enough for Buffy to dart in and plunge her stake into it's eye. The creature shrieked, flailing wildly as it died. One clawed hand caught Buffy across the throat. Oz caught her as she fell, pulling her a safe distance away from the dying demon. Even as he did so Oz realized he was too late to help her. 

As the demon collapsed into death, Oz covered Buffy's body with his jacket then went to check on Angel. The first thing he noticed was the branch impaling the vampire's chest. 

"Angel don't move," Oz warned. 

Angel glanced down at the branch. " It's okay," he said. "It missed the heart." 

"Not by much." 

"How's Buffy? That was Buffy right? She's really here?" 

"I'm sorry Angel," Oz began. 

"No!" Angel yelled struggling to rise. "I'm not going through this again. I won't let her be dead! Not again!" 

Oz caught the vampire's shoulders. "Come on Angel, be still. That branch could still stake you if keep moving around like this." 

Angel looked closely at Oz. "You're not old," he said. "Buffy was really alive again. The portal took me back. It doesn't have to end this way. I'll do better next time. She doesn't have to die, I can fix it. This time we'll be ready, we have sixteen years to prepare. I won't let her die again." 

Relaxing Angel leaned back against the ground, then jerked forward, eyes wide with shock. "No!" he exclaimed. His eyes met Oz's, "You have to tell them. You can still save her…" Angel's words trailed off as his body crumbled to ash. 

Oz sat back on his heels. "Tonight was supposed to be quiet," he said sadly. 

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	5. epilog

Full Circle Epilogue

Disclaimer:Premise and characters borrowed from "Buffy the Vampire Slayer" and "Angel".

2020

"Xander are you sure that we need to be here?" Patience asked."Cause I'm averaging less than one slayable per week since we got to Sunnydale."

"I'm sure," Xander said, looking solemnly at his seventeen year old Slayer."Angel does a good job of keeping Sunnydale clear of demons, but the last time he faced this thing he was assisting Buffy Summers and they both died."

"Okay Watch-man, back track here," Patience said."I know Buffy was the Slayer when you were in High School and you were her best bud.I know she died, like twenty years ago, but Angel isn't dead.I'll bet you he's out patrolling and being all obsessive again right now."

"Buffy died sixteen years ago," Xander said."Not twenty and Angel and I believe we'll have a chance to save her this year.You see; Angel did die the night Buffy did.You know Oz?"

"Beth's dad?Sure, he's cool.So's Beth, it's great having a friend who already knows about all this Slayer stuff," the current chosen one replied.

"He was there that night," Xander continued."The demon that killed Buffy appeared out of a portal, Angel followed it through.He and Buffy killed it, but were both fatally injured.Before he died, Angel commented that Oz was too young, then he got all excited and said that he had sixteen years to stop Buffy from dying."

"At the time, Oz had no clue about what Angel meant, and the idiot vampire ignored the fact he'd been impaled on a tree branch.If Angel had just stayed still until Oz got the damn branch out of him he could have explained exactly what he meant." Xander said disgustedly."Instead he staked himself leaving us with just a riddle."

"Not to be redundant or anything," Patience interjected."But Angel's not dead, except in the vampire sense."

"I know," Xander replied."We called down to LA that night to let Angel's partner Doyle know what had happened, only Deadboy picked up the phone."

Patience's eyes popped as she realized what Xander was inferring."Time travel," she exclaimed."You guys think that the demon that killed Buffy and the Angel that died were from the future!So if you could kill the demon before it went back in time Buffy wouldn't have died."

"You got it kiddo," Xander said."The old Slayerettes have been getting ready for this chance for years.But when we find this demon you be damned careful Pae.You're going to have a lot of back up, but remember, this thing killed Buffy and she had several years more experience than you."

"I'll be careful," Patience sighed."I'm always careful.Really Xander you need to loosen up a little!"

Xander laughed shortly."We all used to say that exact thing to Giles when I was in High School.We had no clue how he must have felt sending Buffy into harms way so often.I feel like I should be protecting you Patience, but I can't, all I can do is make sure you're prepared."

Angel burst into the mansion five minutes after sunrise, his coat flung over his head smoke rising from his body.

"Cutting it a little close?" Willow asked.

"Why are you here?Did you see the demon?" Angel did even bother to specify which demon, as far as he was concerned there was only one, everything else was just practice.

"I'm here to make sure you eat.There's fresh blood in the ice box," Willow replied."You're not going to do Buffy any good if you get yourself fried or if you're too run down to fight when the time comes."

"I know," Angel sighed."I'm just terrified that I won't find it before it goes back.That I'll screw up again and Buffy will still be dead."

"Angel, you can't blame yourself for what happened that night.No one expected Buffy to be facing anything worse than a few fledging vamps," Willow said.

"I don't want to mess up like my future self did that night," Angel rephrased.

"Go eat," Willow said ending a conversation she'd tired of years ago.Against all logic Angel was determined to take the blame for Buffy's death.He'd been utterly consumed by the faint hope offered in the cryptic message the other Angel had left them before dying.

Xander was equally obsessed.It created a bond between the two.They shared a purpose, but never friendship.Willow worried about both of them and Giles as well.She and Oz missed Buffy as well and wanted this chance to undo that night, but unlike Angel and Xander they didn't live for it.As for Giles, he still grieved.The hope Xander and Angel embraced with such passion was too thin a rope for Giles to cling to.

Giles had always known the statistical probability of Buffy dying young, and when it happened he had been prepared to accept it.His heart broke for his surrogate daughter and nothing could mend it, but he couldn't bring himself to chase ghosts.

There had even been fights between Giles, Xander and Angel.Giles saw their refusal to grieve as a betrayal and they felt his lack of hope was the true betrayal.

And Willow, along with Oz, quietly raised their daughter, mourned the absence, if not the death, of one friend and tried to keep their remaining friends whole.

Willow worried most acutely for Angel.Giles had survived Buffy's death despite the scars it left.Xander had Patience now, and no matter how this year played out he wouldn't abandon his duty as her Watcher.Angel had nothing but the hope of saving Buffy.

"Xander shouldn't you be patrolling with your Slayer?"Angel asked quietly as the other man joined him.

"It's two o' clock," Xander said."Patience is at Willow's, in bed.I wasn't ready to turn in just yet."

Angel nodded then went back to checking out one of Sunnydale's many cemeteries.

"What's she like, your Slayer?" Angel asked after almost a half-hour of patrolling.

"Pae?She's a little like Buffy I guess; sometimes she rebels against being the Slayer, against not having a normal life, but she's always come through for me.She's got a good heart," Xander replied."The Council found her when she was eight but her parents refused to let her be trained.They died in a car wreck when she was eleven the Council did some highly questionable things and ended up with custody of her.She's been like a kid sister to me ever since."

"I can imagine how the Council must have loved that," Angel said.

"Oh yeah, they tried to reassign Patience to a more appropriate Watcher, and me to the records division, only Pae took exception.She ran away half a dozen times before they gave in," Xander replied."Patience was called when she was fourteen, she's one of the youngest Slayers ever."

Angel held up a hand, silencing Xander, together they crept forward."It's the wrong demon," Angel cursed, looking disgusted he broke cover and attached the demon.Xander hurried to assist him.

"Look," Angel said as he punched the demon in face."I've been after one particular demon for seven months now. I've been waiting for it for sixteen years.You're not it and I resent the waste of my time."

The blow sent the demon reeling back.A kick from Angel sent it tumbling over a grave marker; before it could rise Angel drew a knife from his ankle sheath and slit the creature's throat.It managed a gurgling sound before it died.

"That was quick and brutal," Xander commented."What are we going to do with the body?"

"Leave it," Angel said."If we're lucky some other demon will see it and decide Sunnydale isn't where it wants to be.You know sometimes I think if I kill enough demons, if Sunnydale gets a bad enough reputation, maybe the one that killed Buffy will decide to go to a different Hellmouth and she'll be safe.I wonder what it will be like when we change what happened.Will we remember this or will it just evaporate?"

"I don't know," Xander said."I don't even know what to hope for.I don't want to forget Pae, but I don't want to remember Buffy dying."

Patience walked beside Beth as they headed toward school."Do your parents ever talk about her?" Pae asked.

"About Buffy?" Beth clarified.

"Yeah, I wonder about her a lot," Pae said."You know if this works and we save her, I'll probably never have been the Slayer.I'm from the line of Slayers activated by her second death. Xander doesn't talk about her much, but she's the reason he's a Watcher.Then there's Angel, she's his whole world.I just wonder what she was like that she could effect people so much."

"Buffy introduced them to a whole new world, one where the supernatural was real," Beth said."How could that not change a person?As for Angel, she's what connected him to the world."

"I can see that," Patience said."I hope we save her for them, and for me too.I would have liked to be a kid for a while longer.It was hard enough when I was just a Slayer-in-waiting."

"I can imagine," Beth said."Everything I've heard about the Council makes them sound like they're totally into no fun."

"No kidding, it's sacred duty blah, blah, blah responsibility to the world blah, blah, blah.They eat, breath and sleep that stuff.Xander's the only one who doesn't think fun is a four-letter word.And he's the only one who ever treats me like Pae Lightner instead of just a prospective Slayer," Patience said."He used to smuggled in pizza.I loved it, it was just so normal."

"Xander's always good for junk food," Beth said."He introduced me to wonders of Hostess when I was little.Mom was furious."

Patience giggled. "My mom never liked me to have sweets either," she said.

"So do you still like school?" Beth asked.

"Oh definitely, this is so much more fun than Council schooling.It's cool having classmates.You have no idea what it's like when the teachers out number the students…"

Angel froze; if he'd been breathing he would have stopped.This was it, the Demon was right there.For the first time Angel truly was glad to have the cell phone Willow insisted he carry.Normally it was an annoyance that always rang at the wrong time, usually when he was right in the middle of sneaking up on something, but not tonight.Tonight it meant he'd be able to call for back up without ever letting the demon out of his sight.

Angel knew this thing was capable of killing both himself and Buffy in a fight, so taking it on alone would be a fool's plan.On the other hand, if he let it out of his sight it could disappear into the past to kill Buffy yet again, and he couldn't let that happen.It didn't matter how powerful this thing was it wouldn't get to Buffy, not again.

"Hello?" Willow said.

"It's Angel, I found the Demon.Have everyone meet me in Cope's Park.We're at the west gate and it's heading toward the play-ground area."

"We're on the way," Willow replied.

Angel smiled gratefully as he accepted the heavy ax Willow offered him."We do it just as planned," He said."Willow will cast a binding spell on it to prevent it from going back in time.Patience and I will close with it and try to get a killing blow.Xander and Oz stay back, watch for a chance to shoot it."

"That's your plan, not the one agreed on," Xander disagreed, checking over his rifle."Oz and I shoot first.We don't go to hand-to-hand until all else fails."

"What if it runs?" Angel objected."If it gets far enough from Willow her spell won't hold.We can't risk that."

"But we can risk you and Pae?" Oz asked.

"If it runs we chase it," Xander said firmly."If the two of you close with it Oz and I will have to worry about shooting one you by accident.You'll wreck our ability to be effective."

"If it runs I'm closing," Angel said irritably.

Willow lit a candle and staring through the leave of their concealing bush at the large armored demon, she muttered a quick phrase in Latin."So mote it be," she finished and the candle flame flared then turned a sullen purple.

Xander targeted the creature with his gun and waited for it to turn and give him the perfect eyeshot.Oz moved to the right looking for his own shot as Pae and Angel arrayed themselves between Willow and the demon, ready for trouble.

The creature's head jerked up abruptly and it scanned the night with malevolent, gunmetal gray eyes.

Xander's rifle cracked sharply and the creature stumbled back with an angry roar, when it looked up again they could see the bloody furrow where Xander's bullet struck it's skull and been defected.

It reached up to trace a circle in the still air but the fire that followed it's finger died away as soon as it left the demon's hand.

"You dare restrain me?" the demon demanded.

Xander shot it again and the creature lowered its head and charged him.Oz took a shot of his own, scoring a gash on the creatures leg.Then Angel intercepted it, stepping into its path, his ax held at ready.

"Out of the way mosquito," it growled.

"Never," Angel replied attacking the demon.It grabbed Angel's ax as he brought it down, easily absorbing the force of the blow then using its hold on the ax to toss Angel away from it.The dark-haired vampire landed jarringly against the jungle gym.The demon snatched Xander's gun away and broke it in half.

As the creature reached for her Watcher, Pae plowed into it from behind.Xander scrambled back, drawing a knife as he did so.Oz circled Pae and the creature, looking for a clear shot.Angel disentangled himself from the jungle gym and retrieved his ax.

The demon noticed Willow, still holding her candle and staring at it, and realized that she was responsible for holding back its magic.The demon hurled one half of Xander's rifle at her.The metal barrel struck the red-haired witch's head and she crumpled soundlessly to the ground.

Oz took a shot, which disappeared into the night over the combatants' heads as Angel rejoined the battle.The demon was swinging the stock of Xander's gun like a club, keeping both Pae and Xander at bay.Angel grabbed the demon from behind, pinning its arms to its sides.

Pae took advantage of the demon's predicament, bringing her sword down in a decisive swing just as the demon managed to twist around, pulling Angel into the sword's path.Pae stared at her ally in horror as her sword jarred to a stop against Angel's collarbone.

Guiltily, Pae dropped her sword.The gray skinned demon tossed Angel away again then dealt a disabling blow to the stunned girl.Xander caught Pae as she fell and pulled the injured Slayer to a spot of relative safety.

Oz, standing protectively over Willow, unloaded his gun into the demon.Angel picked up Pae's sword with his good arm and unsteadily approached the demon as Oz reloaded.

The creature began to open its portal again; Angel hurried to stop it but was too late.Oz tossed the dark-haired vampire his pistol then lifted Willow into his arms.Angel glanced at Xander, who was tending Patience's injuries.The young Watcher looked torn."I can't leave her," He said."Not even for Buffy."

Angel nodded and stepped through the portal alone.On the other side he found the demon fighting Buffy.A much younger Oz caught Buffy's stake and tossed her a heavy knife.

The demon caught Buffy's hand in a crushing grip, she screamed in pain.

Angel slash the barrel of Oz's gun across the back of the demon's skull.It released Buffy and grabbed Angel by the throat, lifting him from the ground.Angel pointed the gun at its eye from point blank range and fired, then quickly pinned the creature's arms to its sides as it began jerking about in its death spasms.

The weight of the creature pulled Angel to the ground as it finally collapsed into true death.

"Angel?" Buffy asked.

It took all of the souled vampire's remaining strength to pull himself from under the demon so he could see her.

"You're hurt," Buffy said, her voice filling with concern as she noticed his blood-soaked shirt.

Angel stared at Buffy in absolute awe."You're alive," He said."It worked, we did it."

Buffy knelt beside Angel gently checking for any head wounds."Uh-huh, I'm alive, just like yesterday and the day before that."

"You weren't," Angel said catching her hand in his."Not for sixteen years.That thing killed you the last time, but we fixed it.You're okay now.I love you so much Buffy, please promise you won't leave me behind again."

"It's okay," Buffy reassured him."I'm okay, confused, but okay… Angel!?"

Buffy stared in horror as the souled vampire slowly lost substance and vanished."No! Angel!" Buffy shrieked."He just disappeared.What happened to Angel?"

Oz helped the Slayer to her feet and led her out of the cemetery; the stunned girl kept glancing back at the spot where Angel had been.

An unfamiliar car was parked at Giles' home when they got there.When they opened the door they saw Angel, whole and uninjured, talking seriously with Giles.

Buffy threw herself into her former boyfriend's arms with a happy cry.Angel caught her, hugging her slim form tightly.

"I thought you were gone," Buffy murmured as Angel said, "I had this feeling that you were in danger tonight, I had to come."

2021

"Angel-love, Xander's bringing Pae out for a celebration this weekend, it's her eighteen birthday." Buffy said to her husband.After the scare they'd had in 2004, they'd given up staying apart.They both felt that they had almost lost each other forever that night and afterwards they hadn't been able to bring themselves to go back to living in separate cities.

Which put them right back in the same untenable situation they'd faced during Buffy's senior year of High School.Only this time Willow was a much more accomplished witch.It had taken her almost three years, but in the end Willow managed to alter Angel's curse so that there were no more loopholes.

Xander had been working with a girl named Patience Lightner, a potential Slayer, who had been discovered by Council when she was eight.Her parents had been opposed to allowing her to be trained, but Buffy had persuaded them to allow Xander to train Pae while she continued living with her parents. 

For Pae, her eighteenth birthday meant that she'd fulfilled her scared duty and now she was free to pursue a normal life, no Slayer had ever been called after they turned eighteen.For Buffy the celebration was of having beat the odds once again, at forty she was the oldest slayer on record, fifteen years older than she had ever hoped to be.She had been married to Angel for ten years, which was another record; no Slayer had ever been married before, let alone to a vampire.

She and Angel were an incredible fighting team, backed by Giles, Willow and Oz they were unbeatable.And they were happy; they were together.Giles, Xander, Willow, and Oz were their family, along with Xander's Slayer-in-waiting and Willow and Oz's two children.

Angel smiled back at his wife, "It'll be good to see them again, has Xander been reassigned yet or will he be staying in Sunnydale for awhile?"

"He's staying," Buffy said.

"Oh well, it can't all be good news," Angel sighed dramatically, he and Xander still cordially despised one another.Privately Buffy thought they just enjoyed disliking one another too much to give it up.

"We've got to talk to Willow tonight," Buffy commented a little too casually."She said she found this new spell and maybe it'll make it so we can have kids after all…"


End file.
